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Old 08-04-2004, 03:00 PM
Clint Clint is offline
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Posts: 84
Funny Game Stories

We had one female player who was well known for characters lacking interpersonal skills. After one incident, one player blurted out, "Have you NO social skills whatsoever???" Another picked up her character sheet and scanning down it quickly replied, "No. In fact, she does not have a single social skill."

One particular time stands out. My PC was a paladin who worked directly for the patriarch of the church. She decides her character "needs religion," and actually asks what the proper term for the patriarch is. To which, she is told, "Your Eminence."

She goes to the patriarch in the church garden, kneels down directly in front of him, lifts up her head, and says...

"Your Immenseness..."

To which, the GM as Patriarch replies, "Why, thank you."

"Me? I blame the pudding pops."
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Old 08-04-2004, 03:27 PM
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Jackson is offline
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LOL. Hate to admit it, but I had to read that one twice to get it! FUNNY!
I check my EVP recorder, anything interesting?

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Old 08-04-2004, 05:11 PM
Clint Clint is offline
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Oh, I can go on with stories about her.

She was also one of those players who couldn't leave things alone. So, once we're playing a Shadowrun type game, and the group has to explore an old temple in Mexico. We're walking down this hallway, and in the middle is a statue of a man holding a rod in his outstretched hand. The following is a transcript...

Everyone Else: "Don't touch it."

Her: "When I get up to it, I grab the rod and pull it to see if it comes out."

Everyone Else: "No!"

GM: "You pull the rod and the entire arm moves to the right. Walls come down at each end of the hall, and a green gas begins seeping in through the floor."

Everyone Else: "AH!!! Let it go! Let it go!"

Her: "I pull the rod to the left!"

Everyone Else: "NOOO!!!"

GM: "Panels open all along the wall, and zombies begin pouring into the hall."

I swear we used to say her battle cry was, "Ooo, shiny!"

"Me? I blame the pudding pops."
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Old 08-06-2004, 11:26 AM
Clint Clint is offline
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This other time we were playing super-powered mercenaries using GURPS. We end up taking over a facility that manufactured Super-Soldier Serum. One character, the psi, decided to try it. He gained amazing physical and fighting abilities, but lost his psionic powers.

Well, this same female player from before was supposed to be the "highly skilled" fighter, so she challenged him to a sparring match. But rather than letting the GM explain their abilities, she insisted on actually running the combat.

First round, she has initiative, and her "highly skilled" fighter decides in a sparring match to kneel down and punch her opponent in a... very sensitive area, and she decides to All-Out Attack, getting two attacks instead of one.

She grins viciously and says, "Punch to the groin! Punch to the groin!" as she is successful in both attacks.

But our new super-soldier has a super-dodge as well. He makes both of his defense rolls, and then asks the GM, "She had to kneel down, so her face would be about here, right?" The GM nods.

He smiles knowingly and says, "Dodge. Dodge. Boot to the head!"

She's frustrated, but says contemptuously, "Fine. I can dodge too."

To which I, watching the whole thing, reply, "No. You can't; you chose to All-Out Attack. You only have passive defense now."

Big surprise; it didn't help her, and she watched with a fallen face as the other player rolled damage, multiplied it by 4 for a head shot, and knocked her out in one blow.

He just walked away and left her on the mat, unconscious with a boot print on her forehead, as a lesson.

To this day, I still get a... ahem, kick out of "Boot to the head!"

"Me? I blame the pudding pops."
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Old 11-30-2005, 02:49 PM
Muse Muse is offline
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: North Carolina
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Just in case anyone wonders... that particular female player set Clint up with his wife. I'd know.
-Muse aka Jodi Black

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